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The Strange Trees
A cute Play on French accents & associated puns -- a real groaner. Some sort of French accent greatly adds to the credibility of the skit.
Players: Narrator General Bear, Sergeant Major, Captain, Sergeant, Private
Narrator: General Bear, the great right arm to Napoleon wanted to know what General Wolfe was up to and what his position was. So he decided to send out some reconnaissance.
General Bear: (To Sergeant Major) “Send out a Scout to see what General Wolfe's troops are up to!”
Sergeant Major: (To Private) “Find out what General Wolfe's troops are up to!”
Private goes off, then a moment later comes limping back, injured, just barely clinging on to his life.
Sergeant Major: (To Private) “What's wrong? Did you find anything about Wolfe's troops?”
Private: (In raspy, dying voice) “Bacon Tree!” (And he dies.)
Sergeant Major: “Inexperienced fool! (To Sergeant) Find out what General Wolfe's troops are up to!”
Sergeant goes off, then a moment later comes limping back, injured, just barely clinging on to his life.
Sergeant Major: (To Sergeant) “What's wrong? What's Wolfe's position?”
Sergeant: (In raspy, dying voice) “Bacon Tree!” (And he dies.)
Sergeant Major: “He obviously wasn't inconspicuous enough! Captain Find out what General Wolfe's troops are up to!”
Captain goes off, then a moment later comes limping back, injured, just barely clinging on to his life.
Sergeant Major: (To Captain) “What's wrong? What's Wolfe doing?”
Captain: (In raspy, dying voice) “Bacon Tree!” (and he dies.)
Sergeant Major: “What's wrong with you people? I guess I'll have to find out what General Wolfe's troops are up to myself!”
Sgt. Major goes off, then a moment later comes limping back, injured, just barely clinging on to his life.
General Bear: (To Sergeant Major) “What's wrong? What are General Wolfe's troops up to?”
Sergeant Major: “Those fools! That was no Bacon Tree! That was a Ham bush!”
(And he dies.)