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Doctor! Doctor!
Players: Doctor, 13 Patients (add as you wish, this can go on all day)
The secret to success with this series of quickies is to keep them moving along. You have one doctor and different patients.
Pat1: Doctor! Doctor! I feel like a set of drapes.
Doc: Pull yourself together!
Pat2: Doctor! Doctor! Am I going to die?
Doc: That's the last thing you'll do.
Pat3: Doctor! Doctor! Everyone keeps ignoring me.
Doc: Next!
(repeat, then patient leaves flustered)
Pat4: Doctor! Doctor! My back feels like a deck of cards!
Doc: I'll deal with you later.
Pat5: Doctor! Doctor! What's wrong with me?
Doc: Have you had this before?
Pat5: Yes.
Doc: Well, you've got it again!
Pat6: “Doctor Doctor, How long will I live?”
Doc: “You'll live to be 40.”
Pat6: “I am 40.”
Doc: “See!”
Pat3: Doctor! Doctor! Everyone keeps ignoring me.
Doc: Next!
Pat7: Doctor! Doctor! I've got insomnia.
Doc: Don't lose any sleep over it!
Pat8: Doctor! Doctor! My friend's doctor told him he had appendicitis and, two weeks later, he died of heart failure.
Doc: Don't worry. If I tell you you've got appendicitis, you'll die from appendicitis!
Pat9: (Holding up his hands like a dog begging.) “Doctor Doctor I think that I am a dog.” (Through out the skit the person acting like a dog, does dog-like things, like scratching behind his ear, whining, etc.)
Doctor: How long have you had this problem?
Pat9: Ever since I was a puppy.
Doctor: Why don’t you lie on the couch?
Pat9: I can't. I am not allowed on the furniture.
Doctor: OK then, we’ll make sure that you get all your shots and don't go chasing any cars.
Pat10: Doctor, Doctor, I hurt everywhere I touch. Look, my knee, my elbow, my head (touch each area with index finger as named). What is wrong with me?”
Doctor: It appears to me that you have broken your finger.
Pat3: Doctor! Doctor! Everyone keeps ignoring me.
Doc: Next!
Pat11: Doctor, Doctor, I had a dream last night. First I was a Wig-Wam then I was a teepee.
Doctor: Relax. You are just two tents.
Pat12: Doctor, Doctor, Last week you told me to drink orange juice after a hot bath to cure my cold.
Doctor: “How did it go?”
Pat12: I still haven’t gotten to the orange juice yet.
Doctor: “Why not?”
Pat12: “Have you ever tried to drink a hot bath?”
Doctor: “NEXT!…Oh it’s you, I have bad news for you. you only have six months to live.”
Pat13: “But, Doctor I won’t be able to pay my bill inside of six months.”
Doctor: “Then, I’ll just have to give you another six months.”